The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy: Will the last person not on the dole please punch in and get busy?

The problem with bailouts, aside from the fact they promote socialism, take away the incentive to succeed, allow crappy businesses to continue, stifle innovation, prevent morons from making needed career changes, and generally screw up the economy, is that they don’t work.

I am trying to think of a business that got on the government dole and never came back for more. I am trying to think of one business that was actually made stronger by being bailed out. I am trying to think of any government payout program that ever got smaller much less went away. I can’t. Once you start passing out free money it’s hard to stop.  

The line to get some free cash will just keep getting longer. Here we are bailing out AIG and countless other Wall Street firms, automakers, airlines and this morning American Express fronted up with their hat in hand. Steel makers are getting ready to ask for some spare change and why not! The State of California is running 28 billion in the red this year and may ask Uncle Sugar for some cabbage to help support to millions of “non-citizens”, (the latest PC term of illegal aliens), sucking the life out of the Golden State.  Hey I have a night club that isn’t doing too well I wonder if I could get a billion or two? In the past we have built billion dollar sports stadiums for ultra-wealthy team owners so they wouldn’t move their three hundred minimum wage jobs to some other city full of suckers.

Not to be outdone by the corporate world the private citizen also has his hand out for a handout. Some forty million “tax payers” get a “refund” even though they put in nothing thanks to the earned income tax credit, a welfare program Mr. Obama has pledged to expand. Then there are homeowners who want the government to pick up the tab for houses they couldn’t afford to begin with, another welfare program that seems have bi-partisan support. So here is my question, am I the only person who is too stupid to be on the dole?   We ran out of money a long time ago and at some point in the very near future our collective credit card will be maxed out. Sure the folks in D.C. can crank up the printing presses and soon we will all need an SUV to have enough room for all the inflated cash we will need to pay for our double cheeseburger at the drive thru. Yet everyone in Washington is talking about another round of stimulus checks. If I did what the government is doing I’d be upstate doing 3 to 5 for writing hot checks.

My suggestion is that as a nation we go cold turkey. No more hand outs for anyone. Welfare is a lot like heroin. It may relieve pain in the short run but it is highly addictive. What America needs is a Betty Ford clinic for our addiction to a government check.  

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2 Responses to The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy: Will the last person not on the dole please punch in and get busy?

  1. Maber says:

    A. Freaking. Men.

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